As a parent of two seniors (one college and one high school) I am grieving a lot lately:
The loss of our son's senior soccer season; the one where he was set up as captain and his team was poised to play to win another state championship. A whole season full of promise evaporated.
The loss of graduation travel and celebrations for my daughter as she graduates from four long years at the University of Missouri. A whole weekend of fun exterminated.
The loss of everything associated with the last semester of senior year for our son, including graduation as we expected it to be. A whole semester extinguished.
The loss of all the usual spring-time fun of gatherings at friend's houses and restaurants and parks and dates out at water-side favorite spots. A whole calendar full of plans ended.
Some days I can navigate the loss with ease, telling myself that God will work all of this for our good. That he will return what the proverbial locusts have stolen. And I am OK.
But other days the grief overwhelms every thought, every action, every step.
An optimist by nature, this negativity feels foreign and draining, yet I do not know how to make it stop.
I read this passage today by "accident." I was looking for verses that offered comfort and amid 30 or so others it stood out like a huge beacon: Blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted.
It's a promise. We, you and I and every other grieving person right now, WILL be comforted.
We are blessed in our mourning as it gives us the opportunity to be comforted by God himself, who surely mourns with us.
I wish more than anything right now that we did not have to go through this, especially for those who have lost much more than I have, but there IS goodness in our grief: Closeness to God if we draw near to Him and ask Him to comfort us.
Today I write about my grief, trying to normalize it so it doesn't hurt so much. Today I will allow the grief to rise up so again I can take it to the Father who loves me and ask Him to comfort me, to give me His eyes to see His blessings that are present in every day amid the loss and to give me His strength to life a life of faith in the face of unexpected endings.
May you be blessed by His comfort in your grief as well.